A Dark Night of the Soul

I've been clashing with people (or they have been clashing with me) over the content of my blogging. Some of it is to do with my stance (personal thoughts and feelings) on the issues and experiences I choose to write about; some of it is to do with the privacy concerns of people I may reference (although not by name) in telling my life stories.

I don't experience life in a vacuum, I live in relationship and interaction with other people; some are closer to me than others. They have affected me both in the past and in the present - my experiences with others have significantly shaped me. I can't write meaningfully, or in any way that would make sense, by avoiding all references to other people (or at least to those who are now telling me they object to being referenced, and expect me to cease and desist from further mentioning them ever again).

And I'm not talking about blogging any kind of earthshattering exposes, or something intentionally hurtful. I am talking about sensitively exploring my life, thoughts and feelings with respect to things I have experienced and learned. And we do not learn in isolation - we learn a lot of life lessons in response to other key people and situations.

But, quite naturally, some people don't want to be featured in my sharing what I've learned and why. I can understand their opposition; what I cannot do is accommodate their demands for silence on anything that might have related to them. That is censorship, plain and simple.

Let's be clear, I am writing about myself - the references to others are peripheral and are only meant to explain what has catalyzed my thoughts, feelings and blog posts. And I am not writing anything untrue, slanderous, libellous or defamatory.

But, what I am learning about the blog-reader lens is that "it's all about me" (meaning it's about the reader, not the blogger). Everything goes through the reader's filter which removes the overall purpose and thrust of the writing content, leaving only perceptions of "You mentioned me and I feel what you said/how you said it makes me look bad." Or, another criticism is "That's not solely your story to tell", or "You didn't tell all sides of the story."

Well, I am not aspiring to investigative journalism here and there is no blogging requirement to be 100% dispassionate, balanced in presenting all sides, and completely objective. I am only giving my perspective on fact-based truth as I lived it and how I've made sense of it. And I do not intend to stop.

Todo bien. (It's all good.)